Bang! Bang! Bang! Bang! Bang! Crack!
I Pause. I
take a breath. I resume hammering.
Bang! Bang!
Bang! Bang! Pop!
CRASHHH!
I stand there hammer in hand, looking down, grinning a big
fat grin - demolishing walls is soooooo much fun. It’s an intrinsically
enjoyable activity (to me at least). Yet, I don’t know why hammering brings me joy. It simply does: I love the impact of
hammer against wood; when that powerful, destructive, beautiful force hits
something solid. Unchecked destruction brings harm, but channeled destruction,
I can’t quite put my finger on it, but there’s something within that terrible
force that’s awesome and fascinating. I guess normally we aren’t allowed to
destroy things for fun. We’re always holding ourselves in check. But with that
wall, not only was I destroying something, but I was having a damned good time
of it.
While I’m hammering, I get this certain feeling of aliveness - my forehead glistening with
sweat, my forearms dusty and aching, my breath ragged and panting, and my ears ringing
from all that Banging! And my mind concentrated totally upon hammering. No
stray thought wafts by - I’m in the zone. This feeling of flow, of rapture, of
‘being in the zone’– it’s what we are all after, I think, in music, in
religion, in art, in friendship, in sport, in learning, in love. This feeling,
wherever we experience it, is right simply because we absolutely recognize it
to be right. Or perhaps, we never experience any rapture ever and all of our
efforts in life made in attempt to experience it. Maybe rapture is a part of
everyday life if we only woke up to it. Hell, I don’t know, go figure it out
yourself. For me, I like hammering. I leave it at that.
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